The feline soul mate–do you have one too?

I think most cat lovers sense the meaning of  “feline soul mate” right away, but these feelings come from a wordless place.

These feelings soul catdwell in right side of our brain, where words don’t happen naturally.

Thankfully, dictionaries are helpful at moments like this.

Soul mate:

“One who is perfectly suited to another in temperament”

“Someone with whom one has a special, almost spiritual connection”

I like these definitions. They sound like the feline soul mates I’ve known.

What does this experience look like? A few specific traits come to mind. Let me know if you can relate to any of them.

A soul mate cat picks you out

Technically, you might say you went to the shelter and picked him out. Yet, why did you pick him? Because it was clear he wanted to be with you and you found him irresistible, right? He’s usually the cat or kitten who most comes alive when you appear.

Or, your feline friend might have just found their way into your life and it was love at first site. Sharon Callahan’s soul-mate cat Lily was part of a feral family downstairs from her flat. This wee little wild kitten took it upon herself to leave her family and venture all the way up the stairs to Sharon’s door. Lily decided she was not leaving, so she and Sharon proceeded to take care of each other for the full 25 (!) years of Lily’s life.

No matter how you find each other, there’s a sense that it’s meant to be–synchronicity.

They are more effective than a suicide hotline.

Cats who are soul companions are particularly tuned to your feelings, and an inseparable bond forms between you. They may look alarmed, or try to comfort you, when you are upset or ill. I shared some examples of this in Stories of Caring Cats.

Here’s another example. There was a moment several years ago when I was deeply depressed, crying, and seriously thinking–for the first time–of how I should end my life. Suddenly I saw that my cat Bastet had planted herself in front of me with the biggest, most concerned eyes I had ever seen.

I realized that I could never leave her. Frankly, I couldn’t bear that look on her face. I actually assured her out loud that I was going to be okay and that this would pass. I was committed to her. After all, she was in my care and she was a soul mate. Bastet was more effective than a suicide hotline at that very low point in my life.

There’s some amazing little mystery thing that occurs.

I’m talking about the kind of thing that we don’t tend to say much about because it just doesn’t fit how the world is supposed to work.

Rupert Sheldrake, Ph.D., is a scientist who has studied dogs and cats who know when their person is coming home–even when they are arriving at a random, unplanned time in a different car or by foot. The animal gets up and goes to stand at a window or door about 15 minutes before the person arrives. He says this phenomenon only seems to happen with animals and people who are very closely bonded.

You might have an instance like that, where your cat seems to be able to read your mind.

Or maybe your cat had a survival miracle. The little black kitten I adopted when I was four quickly made a habit of sleeping curled up next to me at night. Note that this happened even though I was too young to be the one who fed him. We were inseparable. When I was older and walking down the gravel drive way home after school he’d pop out at me from behind trees in that playful arc-jump that cats do.

One night he didn’t come home. This never happened. I was about 9 years old. I called for him every night and we looked for him for several days and alerted all the neighbors. As the days piled up, I kept calling for him with my child-like assurance that he would return. A family vacation took us out-of-town.

Then, three weeks after he disappeared, a call came from a neighbor. A neighbor had found my cat! He had been caught in the woods on a prickly bush the whole time. He wasn’t even that far away, we just couldn’t hear him. No food, no drink for weeks, but he was still alive. Somehow surviving on dewdrops and the occasional passing insect?

He was emaciated and had to have a graft on his neck where skin had been worn away as he tried to unhook his collar from the bush. That was heartbreaking, and yet darned if he didn’t recover quickly and live more than a dozen more healthy years with us!

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I don’t think we are limited to just one feline soul mate. I suspect that each time we allow a new cat to pick us (assuming we feel quite drawn to them too), they end up being a soul mate. Animals have a sense of who they belong with—follow their lead and you’ll be glad you did.

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89 Responses to The feline soul mate–do you have one too?

  1. Barbara July 27, 2019 at 1:02 pm #

    I lost my kitty soulmate to cancer and now I feel like I’ll never have that bond again. That thought makes me so sad and depressed. My cat saved my life and without her I feel so lost and lonely.

  2. Barbara Lander Burger March 22, 2019 at 6:32 pm #

    Just before Christmas, I had to have my Patches put down. I’ve lost pets before and it hurts but nothing has ever affected me like this. I understand what you all mean about these pets being soulmates.
    I met Patches when he was just a tiny little thing that someone had dropped off at a friend’s farm. I was drawn to him right away and noticed that his eyes were matted shut from that virus that cat’s get. I already had three cats and really wasn’t crazy about adding to that number, after all, I didn’t want to become the neighborhood “crazy cat lady”.
    But this little ball of fluff couldn’t even open his eyes, What chance would he have if I didn’t rescue him. I cleaned out his eyes with some tissues from my car, and then brought him home. The next day at the vet I found out that he only weighed two pounds and probably wasn’t old enough to be away from his mother.
    I nursed him through the virus and got rid of the fleas that covered his little body.
    And then we became soulmates. I’ve never felt such a connection to anyone or anything. For six years, we were inseparable. He would cry when I wasn’t nearby so I know the feeling was mutual.
    I mentioned the two pound weight because he ended up being 19 & 1/2 pounds. He was a really big cat with big paws.
    Last November, he wasn’t acting right and he was losing weight. His liver functions were all wrong and there was nothing I could do to save him. Crazy as it sounds I drove around town with him on our way to the vets so we could see the Christmas lights together.
    I held him and said goodbye when the vet put him down but I can’t get him out of my mind. I would give anything to have him back.
    My heart is empty without you, Patches! Please come back to me!

  3. Cindi November 16, 2018 at 8:44 am #

    I dont know how I stumbled onto this website but here’s my story. Im coming out of work, my sister texts me that my mom found a stray 2 week old kitten. I instantly get filled with this feeling of purpose (that’s the best way I can describe it) and run to my car and speed home. When I first laid my eyes on him I began to cry, im not sure why I cried but I just felt like he was ‘the one’. Ive been around cats all my life but Taymin (my cats name lol) he was different .. I felt so strongly for him before I had even met him! Fastforwarding, I mostly took care of him and as he grew day by day , my feelings of attatchmemt and compassion grew. Ive dealt with suicidal tendencies for as long as I can remember. Since I first had him whenever I was in another room breaking down he’d instantly meow non stop outside my door till I open it , then he will just lay on my bed with me and give me that adorable concerned look 🙁 he helps me remember im stronger than I think I am! I just wanted to share this with anyone else who feels the same way with their cat. Im going to say this and mean it, I would take a bullet for him , just because Hes furry and cant talk doesn’t make him any different than a human being. Hes almost a year one by the way!!!!!

  4. lubnadagher3 October 21, 2017 at 8:10 pm #

    I read all of your stories and I wish I had not. I don’t even know how I got to this page but the truth is I have been exhausted ever since my feline soul mate died, which was 4 months ago. I wanted to curse GOD AND ALL HUMANITY, EVEN FELT LIKE AND WANTED TO KILL MYSELF AND EVERYONE ELSE AROUND ME. I FELT LIKE LOVE SUCKED, I WISHED I NEVER FOUND HIM, I WISH I NEVER SAVED HIS LIFE, BECAUSE NOW HE IS GONE AND WHO THE FUCK IS GOING TO SAVE MY LIFE? Antar was the most beautiful, most precious, most loyal, most honorable, most worthy, and the most intelligent cat out there. I have had cats all of my life and i loved them all, and they loved me and of course i cried and grieved when something woukd happen but WHEN ANTAR PASSED AWAY, IT WAS DIFFERENT. ANTAR WAS A CAT BUT TO THOSE WHO KNEW HIM, THEY WOULD SAY ANYTHING BUT THAT. HE ACTED LIKE A BABY, A GROWING CHILD, MY CHILD, WHEN HE DIED THAT WAS I LOST MY SON. NOW I KNOW HOW GRIEVING MOTHERS REALLY FEEL.

    • karen April 4, 2018 at 7:17 am #

      omg
      I feel your pain
      He and you loved each other so much
      You miss him and the pain of being apart is hard.
      I have a cat like that. His name is Simon.
      He is a cat but not like a cat.
      He is different too like your beautiful Antar.
      As long as he is hanging onto me everynight I feel at peace.
      I know I will be devasted like you because he loves me more than anyone ever has and I have another cat and 2 dogs
      We love each other too and care
      but its different with Simon
      Just like your Antar.
      My beautiful Simon like your beautiful Antar they are our soul mates.
      I hope you are okay
      I have read we have more than one soul mate.
      I dont think when its time I will ever not miss him.
      It will take a long time to get used to him not there .
      I hope he sends you another dear friend just purrfect for you.
      You take care
      Healing love and light

      • ailabright April 11, 2019 at 3:37 pm #

        My soul cat found me yesterday came to my house, and we laid together all night. We even went through the whole house spreading positive energy. Her owner found out and I just had to take her back she literally tried to claw me when I tried to remove her from the house. She is also pregnant, but I’m just so upset as was she. I don’t know how to feel about the situation or what to do I felt our connection though and I know we will always be now I’m just so sad.

    • Nirinjan September 24, 2018 at 5:57 pm #

      My father died and I was suddenly shifted to have to finally live with my husband who were doing long distance marriage because I was caring for my sick father. My husband isn’t a cat lover. He denied me my beloved Adel. every night when I go to sleep I cry for my cat and every am I see his little face. I am missing my father and my cat. I want to kill myself from deep grief. Life just seems meaningless without them. I am trying to get husband to understand the love for my cat but he seems jealous. TRUTH be told I love the cat WAY more than him. I can’t explain the bond but it’s HUGE… I am currently looking for someone to fly to FL and bring my beloved cat to me. My husband denied me to go pick him up. Husband also threatens to kick my beloved. I told him I’ll break every electronic he has if he harms my cat. I can’t undertand it and sick and sick with grief. I lost a 19yr pet and never thought I would recover/3yrs then Adel came to me. SOUL connection. I pray and pray my boy comes to me and all is good and safe. YOU will LOVE again🙏❤️

  5. April 25, 2017 at 11:46 am #

    Maybe you’ll know the answer to a question that’s been in my mind since yesterday – nobody else writes about this and knows.
    See, I’m more of a dog person myself. (This is about a cat, tho, bear with me please xD) . Have two dogs, always have had dogs, ever since I was born. I love them, I’d adopt the entire population of abandoned dogs if I could.
    The thing is, I have always been terrified of cats. I don’t hate them (I don’t hate animals at all!), but I’m the kind of person who is so scared (like paralized-when-I-see-one scared) that I don’t really approach them either. I usually run like hell.
    But yesterday, when walking home at night – which is something I hardly ever do – this cat who’s always around the neighborhood entered a house just as I was passing by it, and got mad at something. After I heard a sound that made me think said cat was mad, a little kitten came out of the house running like crazy – and the white cat came after it, but stopped chasing once it was away from the house.
    And I couldn’t stop looking at the kitten. I was a few feet from my house, but something just made me cross the street and approach it, and the little one just approached me – and for the first and only time, I didn’t feel scared. Is that normal, does that happen to anyone else?
    PS.: I couldn’t adopt it cause of my two dogs – they hate cats. I just helped him find a safe place to sleep (a house whose owners just come during weekends and that I know has no dogs in it) and am looking for someone to adopt it. Still, it hurt when I had to let go of the little cat.
    Anyway, sorry if this doesn’t make any sense.

    • Arplix April 25, 2017 at 1:26 pm #

      That’s not weird at all, I’m not scared of cats but dogs have always been more my thing. I rescue any animal I can but I feel the same way about taking in every homeless dog if I could. Until last may, I found a 5 week old kitten that I couldn’t bare to let go and every time I thought about it it hurt. I have 5 dogs who only two out of the five have lived with cats and one of them is not a fan by any means. It took a bit of time, I had to watch over Sam (my kitten) and keep him in a separate room when i was going out until everyone got used to each other. It took a lot of training for myself and the dogs. Now almost a year later he is basically one of the dogs but he does have cat things he does. My chihuahua and him get along great they chase each other around the house and Sam goes outside on his leash and harness with us in the backyard. I know not everyone’s situation works out this way but I’m very glad ours did he is quite amazing for coming into the house of a mainly dog person.

  6. Kim March 20, 2017 at 2:50 am #

    My cat Cleo and I are definitely soul mates. From the time that I met her sitting on a top of a stack of dog food in the vet’s office I have no interest in any other cat that was there. I said to my Dad that that I was the cat I wanted and he replied that it was the same cat that my mom had picked earlier.

    For 17 years we ave been inseparable. She was my only friend through high school as I was bullies and even after high school she competed me when I would come home from work because my co-workers were being mean.

    Se had save my family too. She woke up my mom when she was having a heart attack and notify me when her blood sugars were dangerously low. She would paw at my dad when he would not breathing at night. And I can honestly say I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you with my extreme borderline suicidal depression.

    She was the only ray of sunshine to come home to when I was living alone.it felt good to feel the she need me and that I need. her.

    Unfortunately for her things are to going out to very well. at 17 1/2 she i dying and it could be any day now. people say “it’s the way of life, “it’s just a cat” but when you have looked after it and slept with it for 17 years it really is hard to get involved.

    Everyone called me the crazy cat lady but she is my baby. I might not get the real think.

    Love you more than the world.

  7. Snugs Mum January 8, 2017 at 9:55 pm #

    I am so thrilled to find this site! The stories have sincerely helped me in my recent loss. I have had cats from the beginning of my life. I have seen hardships as a child/adult and found that having cats helped me cope with life itself. Now 46, I still find myself thankful for the memories and still struggle with the loss.

    In our household we have 2 dogs (Bulldog) (Great Dane) Dora my 11 year old senior mummy cat and Snugs my almost 2 year old cat who died at the jaws of our Bulldog. The sad part is my son was trying to be responsible by letting the dogs out while I was at work. My son didn’t close the door properly after letting them back in allowing for access to my little baby snugs and when I came home I let the dogs out yet again without realizing my baby was outside. When I opened the door I was horrified, I still cant get the sight of her out of my mind!

    Events leading up to this my ex-husband knew the aggression of his bully and did nothing even after he attacked our Dane, took a chunk out of his leg and ate it! I should of then done something! I just felt the burden of rehoming and assessing should of been his responsibility. Its hard enough having to make decisions like this. Had I done something Snugs would still be alive today and I am grieving the guilt and wrong doing of my actions.

    I named snugs the opposite of what she really was! she didn’t like to snuggle too much, still she was always there supervising me in tub, lying next me, would extend her body upwards for me to pick her up and hug her followed with a bum pat! She loved to high 5 me in the morning and when she wanted to go outside for a few minutes she would tap the door knob. “Mummy can I go outside for a few minutes” she was a character of her own and one I loved very much! She would stay up with me in my office late always cheering me on! Now I sit here empty, a change has taken place in this household. Bulldog is no longer in our home and is being reassessed for a chance to be rehomed. I still have the Dane but I am not very trusting at the moment and I doubt I will ever own dogs again. Tomorrow the Dane is being assessed. I just cant have another cat die now that the Dane has witnessed a kill.

    I will never get through the image etched in my heart, placing my hand on her lifeless body and asking for forgiveness, I cant imagine how fearful she was and probably wondering where I was when she was losing her life. I failed miserably! I will miss her for as long as I live! Just as my other animals. I turn to scriptures, books, and sites like this for healing, My heart is broken and I am angry! She didn’t deserve this at all!

    I hope that others who find that their dogs lunge or chase cats to please take note for it could end in a tragedy! I wouldn’t want anyone to go through what I have or the burden of a teenager who feels responsible as well. Our cats and Dogs are our children and needed to treated as such.

    To my little snug, may you find the freedom you seek and know that your earthly mummy loves you and misses you beyond words. In my heart now and forever!

    • Rebecca Lynn January 10, 2017 at 8:50 pm #

      Snugs mum,

      It is never easy to lose a fur baby, whatever the circumstances. Try not to blame yourself but instead focus on the good memories with Snug. She sounds amazing, a lot like my cat Romeo. He passed away this past sunday morning from cardio myopathy and kidney failure, he was almost 17 and I had him his entire life. He was my soulmate and completely humanlike, he would come running and meowing when I’d call him and would always know when to comfort me. The bond between him and I was unbreakable. I miss him so much and cant stop crying.. at work, at the gym and at home. I am devastated and feel guilty as tho I could have done something more for him. He had been losing weight the previous months but I chalked it up to old age. I also feel like I didn’t give him enough attention over the holidays, having two little girls now. I just feel empty and broken inside. I too turn to these sites for healing.

      Sending prayers your way.

  8. Sweet soul December 28, 2016 at 12:58 am #

    Im so touched by all of these stories, my heart goes out to all who have lost their soul kitties. I found this website searching “spiritual connection with your cat” because I honestly feel like Miss Mama cat and I have something that ive never had with any animal before. I found her in October, 2013. I was outside calling for my cat, Charlotte. I had just came home from DQ with a vanilla ice cream cone.. instead of Charlotte running up to me, it was a very skinny tuxedo cat that had a pouch-like belly. she was purring and rubbing up on me, she was the sweetest thing! I even let her have some of my ice cream! Thinking she was pregnant by looking at her belly, I wanted to keep her – at least until she had her kittens so they wouldnt be out in the cold.. My father said absolutely not. My mother was a little more lenient and let Mama cat into our house while we tried to look on craiglist, hoping to find her owner. no luck, my mom said that I couldnt keep her inside the house since dad said no… I had to put her back outside. I remember the next day while I was at school it rained so hard and all i could think about was that black and white cat…. I couldn’t believe it, she was at my door step when I came home from school . I took her inside and put her in my room , my mother came home from work and I told her that i just HAD to keep this cat, we posted ‘found cat’ on craigslist, pet fbi, and even had posters up around town, no one claimed her.. eventually I convinced my parents to let me keep her. fast forward to today, Mama cat is my very best friend, follows me upstairs, downstairs , looks out the window while im out back, waits for me outside of the bathroom while im getting ready, waits for me at the door to get home from work.. she chirps and head nods whenever I look at her, sleeps on top of my chest every night. Ive cried about how much I love this cat multiple times. as crazy as that sounds lol.. we just “click”. ya know? She shes such a sweet lil soul… shes right next to me as I type this (,: soul mate kitties definitely exist

  9. Arplix December 4, 2016 at 8:05 am #

    My soul cat is still pretty new he’s almost 9 months old and I found him at 5 weeks old. I’ve rescued other cats and kittens in the years but keeping them was never a thought with 3 dogs. We hadn’t had cats in almost 8 years and i thought it was better to stay that way especially in a small place. Than I found tiny little Sammy (Sam Axe-Franklin is his full name) tucked between my sheds in my backyard and that night he curled up on my lap and slept purring like a mad man I knew we had something. His stunning blue eyes his white fur and a little shock of orange on his nose he was just beautiful. He loves to talk to me, perches while I cook or clean and he climbs me like a mountain. He’s the only cat I’ve met that asks to be picked up, I suffer from insomnia but as soon as he curls up and I start petting him I’m asleep in no time. He has a harness to go outside and he loves being in the backyard on it with me. He would cry at the back door when I had to go out to do yard work so the harness makes him happy since he’s out with me and he gets to watch over what I’m doing. He also protects me in new places when we stay and he hears someone walking around he gets close to me and growls at the sound. When I leave he walks around calling for me, as soon as I get home no matter where he is or what he’s doing he runs to me to be picked up and if I’m sad or having a tough day he just knows I need cuddles. He’s also helped with my anxiety weather he knows it or not I can talk to anyone about him where normally I just want to get away I just wish I could take him with me everywhere because he just makes me feel more confident it’s hard to explain. He gives kisses which I’ve never seen a cat do before and he loves to play fetch. He’s been having blood around his anus with soft stools when I took him to the vet they couldn’t find anything and I’m having a horrible time trying to figure out the cause. They gave him a probiotic last time it seemed to work so I might try that again but it has worried me so much. Our life has gotten pretty stressful recently and I’m trying to keep the stress down for him but some changes that have gone on I can’t really help him with. He’s so special to me, he’s my snuggle boy and he’s my soul mate if there ever was one. I’m looking forward to all the time together all the adventures we still have and of course I can’t forget my soul mate dogs 🙂

  10. Gwendolyn Novak November 5, 2016 at 12:53 pm #

    I was very touched by the other cat lovers. I am so blessed to be chosen by my dear soul 😺. I suffered many tragedies throughout my life & closed off my feelings. I am a changed Woman & I owe it to the unconditional love ❤️ only a true familiar can bring. I was fortunate to visit the shelter on the fateful day. I will never be the same & I am feeling more alive & creative again. Funny thing with a rescue cat 🐱, I was the one that was saved.

  11. Emily October 10, 2016 at 11:21 pm #

    My cat soul mate is missing. Most of my family think Harlie had passed away. I wasn’t his owner. But I went to my grandma’s house every Sunday to play with Harlie. Since I was 5 years old. And now I am 20. I have always felt such a special connection to him. I would hold him and lay with him for hours. I just had this feeling being around him that I can’t explain in words. I always wanted to take him home but my dad is very allergic. Last Sunday I went out to play with Harlie, he always came when I called his name. I picked him up and he put his pawn on my shoulder like he was giving me a hug. He was a lot skinnier and I had just had this feeling for a while that he might not be here much longer. I coudled him so much putting my face in his fur and he purred. I felt like he was saying goodbye. Than on Tuesday he went missing. We still haven’t found him. But I prayed to God that he would be okay and if he is out there that a family took him in and that he is safe. If he did pass away I ask God everyday to hold him and tell him I love him and to pet and coudle him for me. I miss him so much and I can’t stop crying. My mom tells me to stop crying because he is not my cat. But I can’t stop. I loved him more than anything in this world. He was my cat soul mate and I felt so close to him. I hope so bad in heaven that I cat meet him again. I believe I will. I love you my Harlie.

    • Ellen R. October 12, 2016 at 1:13 am #

      I cry with you Emily. My prayers are for both you and Harlie.

    • Gwendolyn Novak November 5, 2016 at 12:56 pm #

      You will meet up with your beloved at the Rainbow 🌈 Bridge. May the love you shared comfort you until you are reunited.

  12. Romy September 15, 2016 at 4:57 am #

    My darling soulmate just passed away today 15/9/2016 🙁
    I didn’t even know he was my soulmate until I took a photo of him today – curled up at peace, with a bunch of daffodils I placed over him. When I looked at the photo after, I was stunned to see that the daffodils had a magnificent glow about them against his pitch black fur. Almost ‘aura’ like. My girlfriend commented that they were positioned where his heart is and he was communicating to me, saying thank you and he was now out of pain and ok. She was the one who said he was my soulmate.
    I now realise he was and still is.
    About 8 years ago he walked into my house, found me and never left. Every day without fail (even yesterday as he was dying) he would greet me at the car – or rather, stand vigil until my return. When I was upset and crying, no matter where he was he would appear and sit on me, keeping me company and calming my nerves. I would even go so far as to say he virtually mimicked my whimpering, in sympathy, at times.
    He ‘understood’ me. And I understood him.
    He never complained, was patient and enduring. I never knew him to hunt or catch anything, nor step away from the house. The many other cats that were introduced in his time, he took in his stride. Not once did he retaliate or sulk.
    He was an old and sensible soul.
    Sadly he passed away today, slipping away after six days of nursing him. He was never a ‘well’ cat – plagued with infections (throat, mouth, teeth, ears, etc) – and would reveal his ‘feral nature’ at the vets, hence my decision to let him pass away naturally. He certainly was not the most handsome, but he was a beautiful soul. And my closest confidante. Nothing was too good for him in my eyes and yet he was a simple cat, not asking for much, if anything at all.
    I miss him so much already and my home feels so empty without him, but I know he is at peace now, which is the greatest gift I could give him in return for all he has done and shared with me. I love him to eternity and back, and know we will meet again in one form or another. He is watching over me, as much as I will always seek that ‘sign’ of knowing he is ok too. I think the glowing flowers in the photo today were very much the first sign.
    I was privileged to have him in my life. And I can’t wait to be reunited with him again in my future – somewhere, somehow, some way.
    Yes, we can and do have soul mates – and yes, they do very much come in many forms. Once you find them, you’ll never want to let go.
    Don’t.
    Ever.
    🙂

    • Ellen R. September 15, 2016 at 10:02 am #

      My heart goes out to you, Romy. Nearly three years for me now (9-24-13). Her loss remains a void; I visit her grave often and occasionally she visits me. Kindred souls. The love of a cat is a blessing. Rejoice in the life that you shared together. *hugs*

    • Ivy November 23, 2016 at 7:17 pm #

      @Romy
      I’m sorry for your loss. He sounds so sweet! Waiting by your car near his death… that breaks my heart but it’s so nice to know he had a really sweet owner who loved him.

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